for the anger
I want to thank her
for the anger
not cuz im mad at her
but because her dark
and her light
caused me concern
to fix my life
to set things right
to maintain my mind
i’ll prepare for whats coming
purify my soul
be more loving
and learn to let go
it was another test
I could not pass
even at my best
love will not last
but then I see
maybe its me
maybe my best
is yet to be
maybe i’m not as perfectas I think
I know this because I was the first to blink
the first to say I’d always stay.
The first to turn and run away
the first to play a stupid game
the first to belittle and toblame
the first to beg
the first to shout
the first to head
for the last way out
the first to curse
the first to scream
the first to hurt both you and me
the first to lie about my intention
the first to spy, deny, and fail to mention
when I met you
what I really wanted
I hid the ghost,
in my haunted heart
and he’s banshee’s taunts
tore me apart
maybe I should have left when you promised no love
but it was my quest to rise above
my earthy desires
but I’m just a man
so the higher I rise, the harder I land
from the clouds, to the ground
I plummet so quick, now im alone in the crowd
cuz I couldnt resist
I would die do have you
even though you said no
I still tried to grab you
and never let go
I insisted, persisted
but hold on tight
and you may break
would you would like to maintain safe
and thats the saddest part of being in love
not seeing when you’ve had enough
to try to have more then is rightfully yours
to try to soar, but end up with sores
try to hoard, but end up poor
try to ignore what you heard as a roar
its the law of the lord, that nothing is for sure
and so you and I
are denied
by the stars in the sky
our fate lies not in each other’s arms
but its not our way to cause any harm
and so I am grateful
for that pain that was caused
because in a strange way, I had thought to pause
its like I tumbled, into your jaws
to be chewed out and humbled by the beauty of God.
And so I have learned
and my ego has burned
as I earn my next turn to squirm as a worm
as I strive
to understand
that being alive
and being a man
means that despite when our prayers
dont go as planned
just be aware
of the blessings you’ve had.